Full Frontal Status

Greg doesn't know his fly is open. . . . Way open.

Delusional Status

Carl knows she's out of his league, doesn't know him, and has yet to realize he's on the train, but all the same he's pretty sure he has a future with that woman.

Verbal Status

Jules uses the f-word like the Smurfs would have if they were called the Effs.

Spoiler Status

Evan just gave away the American Idol results on twitter.

Imaginary Status

Carol just imagined she was the boss and fired everybody.

Doubtful Status

Jeremy doesn't believe anything anybody says about their kids. They're all stupid, underdeveloped monsters.

Amusing Status

Jason didn't hear a single word of that joke, but he still laughed in an attempt to end the conversation.

Identification Status

Matt is pretty sure that hair is his.

Belated Status

Harold is thinking about a kid in sixth grade that he wishes he would have punched.

Smiling Status

Caroline isn't smiling, because no one is looking and she doesn't have to.

Religious Status

Joseph is not really Jewish; he just says that to get out of stuff.

Idol Status

Katherine McPharted.